poor Monday. everybody hates it. it’s not as if Monday did anything to us. it’s just coincidentally situated after a weekend and is just a strong reminder that we have to go back to work or school. i don’t know when i’ve ever been excited for a Monday. maybe in college when i couldn’t wait to see my crush.
lately though, i’ve been having Mondays all throughout the week. as i look back on my previous posts, this laziness and almost-lethargic state that i’m in started on Christmas break. not only have i been sick with my herniated disc acting up, i’ve been unmotivated to get off my bed. it definitely is not helpful for my suffering salary and work. i’ve been finding myself utterly confused about what to do with my life and whether i should be where i am. one thing i only know is how intent i am to marry Harry this year or by early next year. that’s it and i’m lost with the rest of my life. i discussed this with Harry yesterday after visiting the doctor and he noted that i get like this every year. i pondered on it and realized that i do. i hate to admit it but with the slew of lazy days from Christmas break to summer gets me reflecting and over thinking about my things which leads to unhealthy realizations or nonsensical questions and doubts. gaaah, drama! so i’m soldiering on and just hope to get past August, where things usually start getting okay for me. *praying hard*
anyway, just got back from the doctor yesterday and had my MRI results read. as it turns out, i have a few (yes, not just one but 4) mild bulging discs on my spine which is causing me numbness and pain on my neck, arms and legs because these bulging discs pinch my spine. on my MRI, my spine looks like it has a few ridges because of the bulging discs. aside from that, my MRI showed that this bulging discs are also degenerating — something that’s not supposed to happen until i’m in my 60’s. oh well, that’s what i get for working night shifts for 5 years, sitting in front of the computer for hours on end and playing flag football for 4 years from sleepless nights.